32. Do you read in bed?
33. Do you read on the toilet?
34. Do you read in the car?
35. Do you read in the bath? (via)
Ah, this question. I know that’s four questions, but, “Ah, this question.” I’ve noticed people tend to be opinionated about these, but opinionated in pretty much the opposite way that I am. This is hardly surprising, given my absolute goal to be different and unusual.
32. I have been known to read in bed on occasion, but I do not like to read in bed. So no. I know there are whole sites dedicated to the joys of reading in bed, but I’ve yet to find any.
For the last six months, my living arrangement has necessitated that I spend most of my free hours sitting on my bed, and I dislike it immensely. It is uncomfortable. Things constantly fall over. There’s nowhere to put my legs. My arms ache. Reading in bed is an uncomfortable strain and I can never find anywhere to put myself . Even that picture, which I imagine is supposed to look cozy and inviting, just looks uncomfortable and I’m all in a knot waiting for her to knock that mug over. Bed is for sleeping, no more and no less. Don’t ask me to have anything else to do with it. I do not like to be supine, I prefer ergonomic design. I do not wish to lie down and read, a chair and a desk is what I need!
As for number 33, this disturbs me to such an extent that I’m really struggling to even use this picture, which has been on my hard drive since about 2004 but I digress. That’s Jude Law and Ewan McGregor, who were roommates, doing a piece for some British magazine that likes to include pictures of actors who are friends behaving as though they are roommates. I guess. Anyway. *shudder* Toilet reading. Disgusting. Right. Okay, I do not read on the toilet for about seven thousand reasons. I find it completely unnecessary and distasteful, a degradation of books and a disservice to the human body. (Seriously, look it up. The American medical association or some such organization has found that reading on the toilet can lead to an increased instance of hemorrhoids.) Everything about this question embarrasses and horrifies me. Now if you’ll allow me to wash off thoroughly before continuing to the next.
34. Yes, I read in the car and have never understood not reading in the car. I didn’t even know such people existed until I was about 15. I’ve read metric tons of pages in the car. I also read on trains, planes, and ferries. If I don’t have a book, I’ll probably read whatever might be handily in front of me, such as the instruction manual for the glove box. When my sister and I were little, even sundown didn’t hinder reading in the backseat as we would get Dad to drive in front of a big truck, hold our books up to the back window, and read away. My flashlight was my most precious possession growing up because it enabled reading in those sorts of circumstances. (An addendum to earlier, even with flashlight, I preferred reading on the floor to reading on the bed.)
35. Finally, reading in the bath. Absolutely. Reading in the bath is one of my very preferred joys. First of all, a state of more perfect comfort does not exist than being submerged in hot water, which is not a state you’d think I’d choose given my terror of drowning and of deep water. But baths are different. They are secure, nonjudgmental, loving creatures who will camouflage your tears, warm your chills, and allow for completely undistracted reading until thermodynamics finishes its cruel work and the water gets cold.